Procrastination.....and, Life-Long Learning!
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
We all suffer from procrastination at times…no one is exempt. Here are a few tips to help you deal with it:
Do the worst thing first. Attack the hardest thing when your energy is fresh...
Start your day over at 2 pm. At 2 pm, assess how much you’ve accomplished, remind yourself of what’s critical and alter your plan so you can tackle the most important thing. At that time of day, you still have an opportunity to get it done!
Commit to someone else who will hold you accountable. For many people, this works well.
And, try to be a life-long learner! For many, once they are through will school, they stop learning. There are many health reasons why we should commit to learning, at every age. Plus, it adds a sense of enrichment to our lives.
Read books on subjects about which you know little or nothing. Engage in conversations with people who have expertise in an area that you don’t.
Commit to being a life-long learner!
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Don’t allow negative people to influence you, and…be decisive!!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Continuing on my 2011 personal mission to remind people of the control they have over their own happiness...remember that you don't have to allow negative people in your life to influence you. Give yourself distance from them if they're family members or work associates, and certainly don't have them in your circle of friends. It is OK, and healthy, to cut off relationships with friends who do nothing but drain you and create negativity in your life.
And…a stressor in life, especially for women, is being indecisive. When confronted with a choice, consider your options briefly, and then make a decision. (Major life decisions may take a bit more thought) We expend too much time and energy waffling on decisions. Most of them don't require the amount of thought we give them.
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Keeping Secrets, and…Favorite Color!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Keeping secrets can be tough. We should strive to honor our word to keep one's confidence.
Try to resist the temptation to pass on something that was told to you as a secret. It’s tempting to disclose a juicy tidbit of info to someone who you know would love to hear it; it gives us a sense of power to have information that the other person doesn’t. Try to resist. It can be a character-building effort. And, after all, you hope people keep your confidence, so extend the same to others.
My Question last week: What is your favorite color? I'm trying to figure out what the "most popular" favorite color is. Has yours changed over the years?
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March Girls Night Out, and Monthly Challenge!
Wed, March 2, 2011
My next Girls Night Out is Wed, March 30, 6 pm at The Stonewell Restaurant in Farmington. The theme- Women Friendships! There will be games, videos and stories that will recreate the fun and warm feelings we women want and need from our close friends. And, bring your friendship stories to share!
Just $25.00 per person for dinner, incl. tax and tip. Menu choices are Stuffed Chicken Princess, Pasta Mediterranean, Broiled Salmon or Grilled London Broil, with your choice of dessert.
Get your girlfriends together!! Call 860-677-8855 for reservations!
And, my March Challenge: The Power of Silence!!
We live in a world bombarded with noise. So much so, that many people are uncomfortable with silence.
Let's practice being aware that there's a momentary silence in the space between our thoughts. In this silent space, we find the peace that so many crave.
The average person has 60,000 separate thoughts a day. With so many thoughts, there are almost no gaps. No gaps= no peace.
Silence reduces fatigue and allows you to experience your own creativity.
Allow silence into your life. For example, don't play the radio all the time you're in the car. Use that time to enjoy the quiet, remove tension and anxiety. And, don't feel compelled to fill in every pause in a conversation with chatter....experience silence.
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Care Less What Others Think!..and, What Word Describes You?
Wednesday, February 22, 2011
Care less what others think! This can be a tough one, but for a moment, imagine not being affected by criticisms and unkind comments that might be said about you. It feels rather liberating and exhilarating, right? There are certainly people in your life whose opinions you want to be concerned about…your spouse, boss, for example. But, consider the drain on your energy and confidence that others’ unwanted comments create. Keep in mind that what matters is what you think about yourself.
What word would you like others to use to describe you? It gets you thinking, doesn’t it?? It’s not about what word you’d use to describe you but the word you’d like others to use. What word would make you most happy to overhear someone say about you? Give it some thought. When you zero in on that word, ask yourself how accurate you think it is, honestly. Might be insightful!!
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A Positive Attitude Creates Success!
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Keeping with my personal mission this year of increasing the number of people who realize the control they have over their own happiness, I want to share some very exciting news.
For years, researches felt that a positive attitude reflects success, that once your life is good, you’ll have a positive outlook. Experts now know that it is the exact opposite…positivity produces success.
We all know people who are downers…woe is me-types. Have you ever noticed that they usually have a lot to be down about? And, we all know people who are chipper, happy, always smiling - ever notice that they often have a lot to be chipper, and smile, about? See the connection? Think about it…make a mental list of folks in your life…see the connection between their attitudes, mindsets, and their realities, and…guess which one came first.
A positive attitude creates a successful life. And, the exciting aspect of that now known fact is that we have power and control over our thoughts and attitudes! Use it to your advantage! Create a successful and happy life!
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My New Show on WomensRadio!
January 18, 2011
I am thrilled to be a part of WomensRadio, an internet channel that was started to give women a greater voice. I am hosting The Mary Jones Show, an upbeat program offering a fun, inspirational look at everyday life, and encouraging listeners to live with confidence. I’ll share tips and techniques on developing healthy self-esteem, the power of a positive attitude, and guideposts to get and keep you on the road to a happier life.
My tagline? Believe in Yourself!
Please join me on womensradio.com and listen to my Introductory Interview by copying and pasting into your browser the following URL: http://www.womensradio.com/episodes/New-WR-Host-Tells-Women-to-Believe-in-Yourself!/8092.html
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I'm on a Personal Mission!!
Wednesday, Jan 12, 2011
I've introduced my theme for this year....Live in '11!....and my January
Challenge...Be Kind to Yourself!...but, I've decided that I have a personal
mission for the year!
It comes from having many conversations with many people about their degree of
unhappiness, and their feeling that it's "just the way it is". No! It does not
need to be that way, for anyone.
So, I'm on a mission to increase the number of people who realize the amount of
control they have over their own happiness. Scientists have found that we have
as much, if not more, control over our happiness as is attributed to genetic
make-up. And, if we don't seize that control, who will? It isn't anyone's or
anything's responsibility to make us happy....that rests with us.
I'll be sharing tips and techniques to help you do just that. For example, keep
in mind that dwelling on past failures and disappointments tends to lead to
depressed feelings. While it is tempting to re-live these events, it isn't
productive, or healthy to do so. Don't live in the past. Focus on today, and
what you can create for tomorrow.
More to come!
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Theme for the New Year...and the Monthly Challenge!
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
I've come up with a theme for the New Year - Live in '11! This year, we're going to focus on what truly makes us happy, and figure out what we need to do, what we can do, to live the life we want, and deserve. We'll be talking throughout the year about many aspects of the process that we have control over, and can use to get further down the road to happiness. And, my Monthly Challenges will incorporate steps towards that goal.
My January Challenge - Be Kind to Yourself! Our imaginations unlock the power of our minds, both positively, and negatively. We are our own best enemy - let's be our own best friend! Let go of your self-criticisms, focus on positive self-talk. Give yourself the biggest gift this year - Be Kind to Yourself, and watch things unfold!
My next Girl's Night Out is Jan 26, 6 pm at Matthew's Restaurant in Unionville! Mrs. America, Shelley Carbone of Wethersfield, will be my guest speaker! She is the first woman from our state to ever win that title. And, a lingerie fashion show, along with make-up tips! I hope to see you there! Call Matthew's at 860-673-7373 for reservations...only $25.00 for dinner, incl. tax/tip.
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Resolutions and simple energy boosters!
Wednesday, Dec 29, 2010
Following up on last week’s discussion about New Year's resolutions, I want to share a tip - more important than anything, be realistic about any resolution you might set. Don't set yourself up for another year of failed resolutions by choosing one that in all practicality, you can probably predict ahead of time, won’t be kept. There is no reason to set a resolution, no reason to give in to the trend this time of year. Unless it is something that you are totally committed to, and motivated to do, and is realistic, don’t do it. The toll of being disappointed in yourself isn’t worth it.
And, while we’re still in a holiday, and busy, time of year, here are a couple of simple tricks to boost your energy, and get out of that mid-afternoon slump. Try them!
- Light a citrus scented candle…aromatherapy really works!
- chew some gum...peppermint in particular
- do 10 jumping jacks!
Happy New Year!!
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Holiday cards and New Year’s resolutions
Wednesday, Dec 22, 2010
My Question last week on my show was, "What do you do with holiday cards? Display them? Save them, throw them away?" Lots of great answers, including using the fronts of cards for note cards (love that idea!). What do you do?
And, New Years is right around the corner, as is the making of resolutions. Here’s a tip on how to stay on track and stay inspired to follow your goals. Figure out if you’re truly motivated to achieve it. If not, you won’t stick-with-it when obstacles and challenges come your way, as they will. What has worked for me is to figure out why each dream and goal is important, and what is driving me to fulfill it. More than the goal itself, it’s about the motivation for wanting it.
That drive is different for everyone. And it will vary from time to time, goal to goal. But, before you decide to enlist your time, energy and resources into any pursuit, think about why it’s important to you. If the reason isn’t one of significance or emotional value, reconsider. Only that will propel you to overcome the obstacles you’ll undoubtedly meet along the way. Only that will feed your determination. Dream your dreams, understand your motivations, live life to the fullest and persist until you achieve all you desire.
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Buying gifts for men and women, and….are you a hand-shaker, hugger or kisser?
Wednesday, Dec 15, 2010
Are women or men easier to buy presents for? In my opinion women, hands down!! Maybe it’s just me….unfortunately for my husband…but other than electronic gadgets, I can never think of things to buy. Sports equipment, hammocks, and magazine subscriptions…all done many times over. Women? So easy. Nothing wrong with jewelry year-after-year. So many options in the form of fashion accessories, clothes, spa services…the list goes on and on!
My Question of the Week last week on my show, “When greeting people, do you shake hands, hug, or kiss? And, if you kiss, do you kiss on the cheek, or lips?" The vast majority of women who phoned in like to hug. (We’re talking in appropriate situations, of course). Most seem to leave it at that, not including a kiss on the cheek or lips. And, with cold season upon us, I think that’s wise.
Your thoughts?
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Wednesday, Dec 8, 2010
Do Less, Enjoy More!
I've talked with lots of women over the past week who are feeling super stressful over the holidays. I'm encouraging us to Do Less, Enjoy More. Much of the pressure we feel comes from within, is self-inflicted. The good news? We have control over that. Don’t aim for perfection…the perfect gift, the perfect tree, the perfect holiday meal. What will be remembered once the holiday is a distant memory is none of that…it’s the time spent with family and friends, the laughs, conversation, and connection. Once you remind yourself of that, it makes it a bit easier to ease up in putting your holiday together. Focus on what will be remembered….Do Less, Enjoy More.
And, speaking of the holidays, remember some of the significant parts of the holiday season. Think back to holiday traditions/routines when you were growing up. What comes to mind that puts a smile on your face, and in your heart. Maybe you want to re-introduce them now to your family? Few things will be more nostalgic. Give it some thought.
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Wednesday, Dec 1, 2010
Dec Challenge and soliciting submissions to be published!
I am honored to be working with Kiwi Publishing on a new book in their Thin Threads Book Series, Women and Friendship. A "thin thread" is a moment, event, crossroad or encounter that connected you to a person, place or opportunity that changed your life for the better.
We invite you to contribute a true story or anecdote that will bring hope and happiness to all those who realize the possibility in each moment. We are looking for personal stories (800-1200 words) that are real, capture the essence of a thin thread event, and evoke an emotion from the reader. Events that changed you forever.
Friends hold a deep, special bond and connection for women. We are looking for your story. A story from your heart. A story that will bring a smile or tear to others. like the story of how a friend was a lifeline for you, or a story about your life at a time that you realized the power, strength or value of a woman friendship.
Those whose stories are selected will be paid $100.00.
Now, my December Challenge….Judge less! First, take a week or so to simply observe how often you think…or say… a judgment about someone. Pay close attention. You’ll undoubtedly be surprised at how often a passing judgment appears in your mind, or words.
And also, as awareness builds, you might begin to notice patterns in your judgment: are they stronger/louder in certain circumstances? are they of a similar nature? - - about people's appearance? attitude? material wealth? way of speaking? skin color? job status? And, what does this say about how we feel about ourselves? Do we use them when we are feeling scared or insecure? How do judgments impact the way we treat people? Or let them treat us? Do they connect us to people? (Many people, especially women, rely on judgment to build so-called "intimacy" with another. Think of how many times we have bonded with girlfriends/relatives/spouses over a mutual criticism of someone else.)
Judgmental thinking invites negativity into your mind, your life. Let’s work on reducing our negative thoughts, and one way, is to Judge Less!
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Helpful Holiday Hints!
Wednesday, Nov 17, 2010
I am loving the tips coming from my Helpful Holiday Tips segment on my radio show. Last week:
- When guests offer to help out in the kitchen, but you’re not wanting any additional confusion while you’re getting the meal ready to serve, assign them other tasks, such as being the greeter at the door when other guests arrive. They can take guests’ coats, etc.
- Or, ask them to help with the drinks, and have the bar set up in a room other than the kitchen.
- When you are a guest, don’t bring the hostess fresh cut flowers that she will need to find a vase for, cut stems and arrange. It’s too much work for her to do while she’s trying to get the meal ready to serve. (while it’s a lovely gesture, this has always been a pet peeve of mine!!)
- Also, don’t bring dishes that need to be heated up, unless hostess is aware you’ll be doing so. There may not be room in the oven, and the oven may be set at a different temperature than what your dish needs. It’s best to bring dishes that can be served cold or at room temp.
Love these tips!
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Say “no” to doubt and fear!
Wednesday, Nov 10, 2010
I talked last month about my Oct Challenge (Practice saying "no"...before the busy holiday season kicks in...a reminder that we don’t need to say ‘yes’ to every social invite or request for our time that comes along). I emceed a Re-invention Convention recently and tweaked my Challenge a bit to: Practice saying "no"...to doubt, fear, intimidation, and insecurity. Don't allow them to stand in the way of your pursuing your dreams and being bold in life. Live your life so that you won’t have regrets.
And, on my Helpful Holiday Hints segment last week, a chef/food stylist phoned in and suggested we start off by thinking of the holidays as a way to "celebrate life". That puts in a more joyful perspective instantly!! A much less stressful approach… I like it!
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Nov Challenge, and a Book-signing!
Wed, Nov 3, 2010
My Nov Challenge...Be Happy Now! Happiness is not dependent upon external factors. You can choose to be happy, right now. Decide to take responsibility for your happiness....all of it. Every morning this month, remind yourself of this and practice!!! It can be life-changing.....honest!!
And, I’ll be doing a talk and book-signing of the book I’ve co-authored, Incredible Life, on Nov 14, 1-3 pm at Prospect Café in West Hartford. It’s a free event, with raffles, prizes, and loads of fun and inspiration!
Incredible Life is for everyone who wants to make their dreams a reality. It’s filled with invaluable ideas and innovative strategies that are key to having a full and rich life of your own design.
Stop by if you can! While it’s a free event, you can reserve a seat by calling the Prospect Café at 860 523-8069. Hope to see you there!
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Wednesday, Oct. 20
National Make a Difference Day!
Make a Difference Day is the most encompassing national day of helping others -- a celebration of neighbors helping neighbors. Everyone can participate.
Created by USA Weekend Magazine, Make A Difference Day is an annual event that takes place on the fourth Saturday of every October.
The USA Weekend poll reveals that 84 percent of Americans volunteer as much if not more than they did two years ago.
Public service is becoming a way of life, with 85 percent of Americans saying they've volunteered at least once and 59 percent saying they've contributed their time in the last two years.
This Sat, Oct 23, marks Make a Difference Day.
Think about what you can do to help someone else. Whether it's big or small, you can make a difference.
Here are some ideas:
- Hold a food drive
- Do home repairs for elderly and disabled citizens
- Pick up litter on your neighborhood streets
- Plant fall bulbs for a local garden, or neighbor
5. Read to children, friends
And, my question this week: “What would you like to see invented?”
For a lot of women I’ve spoken with recently, a self-cleaning house seems to be a top choice!
Wednesday, Oct 13, 2010
October Challenge, and…Friendship!
My October Challenge for you….Practice saying “no”! With the upcoming holiday season, it's important to feel comfortable turning down social invitations, not offering to take on more than you should, etc. Use Oct to build up your resolve! Each week this month, say 'no' to one obligation or invite that you know you should. With this, practice does make perfect.
The theme for my show this month is "Friendship"...women have been sharing stories about different aspects of friendship...what it means to them, special friends in their lives, how they view friendship differently than they once did, etc. Call in and share yours!
My next Girls Night Out will have Friendship as its theme! National best-selling author, sociologist and Friendship expert, Dr Jan Yager will be our guest speaker. She will share 10 Truths About Friendship That Will Make it Easier to Find, Keep and Grow Your Friendships!
Mark your calendar and plan an attending! Wed, Oct 27 at 6 pm at the Stonewell Restaurant in Farmington. Dinner is only $25.00, tax/tip included. Call to make your reservation, 860-677-8855.
Hope to see you there!
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Friendship and Girls Night Out!
Sept 22, 2010
How do you define a good friend? Friendships between women are special, can be a bit complicated at times, but essential for our mental and even physical health. Research continues to speak to the value of a good friend.
My next Girls Night Out will have Friendship as its theme! National best-selling author, sociologist and Friendship expert, Dr Jan Yager will be our guest speaker. She will share 10 Truths About Friendship That Will Make it Easier to Find, Keep and Grow Your Friendships!
Mark your calendar and plan an attending! Wed, Oct 27 at 6 pm at the Stonewell Restaurant in Farmington. Dinner is only $25.00, tax/tip included. Call after Sept 30 to make your reservation, 860-677-8855.
Hope to see you there!
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Question of the Week…
Wednesday, Sept 15, 2010
My Question of the Week for my radio show is “What was your mother right about?” Now, I realize that this one may take a moment to answer, but do think about it. Think about all those lessons that your mother taught you when you were little…even when you had little interest in listening or learning. Which ones come to mind as being true, and valuable? I bet the list is long….
And…be happy for other people’s successes. Be truly happy. Even for those you don’t feel deserve it. By opening up your heart and spirit to celebrating others’ victories and accomplishments, you will be drawing that same energy into your life. And you will be freeing yourself of those unhealthy resentments that create nothing but negativity for you. Give yourself the gift of being happy for others. I wrote about this in the book that I co-authored,
Incredible Life, that came out this past June. If you’d like a copy, you can check it out on my website,
www.maryjonesshow.com.
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Be happy...not right!
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
A reminder for married couples, when fighting...something I learned many years ago...when arguments start to get heated, say to yourself, "I would rather be happy than right". At that moment, so many people become determined to prove the other person wrong...to prove themselves right...and that's what leads to more emotions, more anger, a more serious argument. Focus on restoring happiness to your relationship and day, and tell yourself "I'd rather be happy than right!"
And, my very unofficial poll of whether more people are sweet or salty in the area of food cravings….sweet won out handily! How about you?? (However, there might be a gender differential here…more women voted for sweet…men seemed to lean towards the salty...hummm….)
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Men Coloring Their Hair......And, About Friendships..
Wednesday July 28, 2010
It seems that men who color their hair don't feel as comfortable admitting it as women who color their hair do. Is that true? If so, why?
I discussed it on my radio show last week and most agreed. But, the reasons don’t seem as obvious. I suspect it has something to do with the fact that vanity is more widely accepted…and, even expected…from women, than men. So, men still feel awkward about spilling the beans on this perceived act of vanity. It’s a shame, I think. Keeping it under wraps is hard and, not very liberating. Come on, guys…’fess up! Might be good for you!
And… on firendships, research cites that women with strong female friendships tend to live longer, and have fewer health problems. In fact, not having close friends is as detrimental to our health as smoking or carrying extra weight. And when women are busy or stressed, they tend to put their friendships on the back burner...shouldn't do that.
But, having hundreds of friends on social networking sites doesn't count! That's not real connection.
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Summer mid-way point…and, favorite summer food!
Wednesday July 21, 2010
We are at the mid-way point for summer so remember to make some memories for Summer 2010!
Now is the time to make plans to go to that destination you’ve wanted to get to, and do that activity that you’ve wanted to do. Don’t wait!
Maybe try something new this summer? Me? I’ve been kayaking for the first time, and loving it!
What's your favorite summer food? Ice cream? Watermelon? Fresh tomatoes? How about a berry pie? Think about your favorite, and eat it!
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July Challenge
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
If you are a man, or a woman who rarely wears make-up, then you have it easy this month with my Challenge! But, for the rest of you….my July Challenge is to go for 2 days with no make-up! And, you have to leave the house…can’t do it over a weekend and stay at home. The main part of this Challenge is to go out in public!
It will be good for your skin, and your psyche to go without for a couple of days. I think a lot of women are too dependent on make-up when there is no reason to be.
So…this month….2 days of no make-up and get out there in public! I’ve been doing it, and trust me, the world does not actually stop spinning!!
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Don’t compare yourself to others!
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
In speaking with women, it seems to me that many spend too much time and energy comparing their lives to others. In this celebrity-crazed society, it’s easy to look at other people and wish your life was more like theirs. Don’t.
First, you have no idea what anyone else’s journey is all about. While anyone’s life…on the outside…may appear to be “ideal”, there often are problems and challenges they are facing. Things don’t always seem as they appear.
Second…and, more important….by comparing your life to anyone else’s, you are instantly viewing yours as “less than”. Consciously or unconsciously, you are sending that “not measuring up” message to your brain.
We need to feel great about ourselves, and our lives...not inadequate. Embrace that which you are happy about, work on improving that which you’re not…those things that you have control over (career, weight, degree of physical fitness, etc.), and make peace with those you don’t.
Remember, comparing yourself to others serves no positive purpose and creates a negative mindset. Focus on your life and your life alone!!
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Be in the NOW!
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
While out for my morning run, I was thinking about the importance of "being in the moment", and how we miss so many great moments when our thoughts are elsewhere. It really is all about the "now". It’s hard to do when we're as busy as most people are, but it’s important to remember, and to practice. No matter what you’re doing…writing a report for school, preparing a presentation for work, cooking dinner or out riding your bike…focus on that moment, that activity. Be in the NOW! Don’t let your life pass you by as you do one thing, but are thinking of another.
I read that 56% of people believe that social-networking sites are a time-waster....do you? Let me know your thoughts!
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Incredible Life!
Wednesday, June 9. 2010
My 2nd book just came out…it’s called Incredible Life, and I’m thrilled to be a part of it. 20 women from across the country wrote chapters for the book…mine is called "Believe in Yourself.....You Have the Power to Create the Life You Want".
I share 14 guideposts to follow to be happier and more confident. These are based on some of the more popular Monthly Challenges that I've been doing on my show for several years. It's all about creating goose bumps in life...what life should be filled with. They are specific things you can incorporate into your life, and things that you have 100% control over….that’s the exciting part, for me.
Create your own Incredible Life!!
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Crying is good for you!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Yes, that is true. If you're a woman, you probably already know that. But, there's proven research explaining why. A good cry is great at getting rid of the stress hormone, cortisol.
That explains why I love a good cry at the movies...just love it!
So, what movies make you cry? It's good to identify them, and then schedule time to watch them every so often. It works wonders!
Three of my favorite crying movies are The Notebook, Brian's Song, and Beaches. Oh, I could cry just thinking about them!
What are yours?
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Take positive thinking to a higher level with 7-Day Mental Diet
I started this on Monday. I’m so excited.
This is something I recently was told about and talked about on my show this past weekend. Many listeners and Facebook friends are starting it with me.
Dr Emmett Fox, who was a lecturer, teacher, author and minister, developed this many years ago.
Here’s what you do. Make up your mind to devote one week solely to the task of building a new habit of thought, and during that week let everything in life be unimportant as compared with that. If you will do so, then that week will be the most significant week in your whole life. It will literally be the turning point for you. If you will do so, it is safe to say that your whole life will change for the better.
For seven days, you must not allow yourself to dwell for a single moment on any kind of negative thought. You must watch yourself for a whole week as a cat watches a mouse and you must not, under any pretense, allow your mind to dwell on any thought that is not positive, constructive, optimistic or kind.
When a negative, critical or unkind thought comes into your mind, instantly discard it. Instantly replace it with a positive thought.
A perfect analogy is furnished by the case of a man who is sitting by an open fire when a red hot cinder flies out and falls on his sleeve. If he knocks that cinder off at once, without a moment's delay to think about it, no harm is done. But if he allows it to rest on him for a single moment, the mischief is done and it will be a troublesome task to repair that sleeve. So it is with a negative thought.
If you’re interested in doing this 7-Day Mental Diet with me, send me an email, or join me on Facebook. It’s going to be amazing! Not easy, but amazing!!
Feb Challenge!
Wednesday, Feb, 3, 2010
Put Yourself First!
This month, let's practice the upside of selfishness by remembering to put ourselves first! I'm sure when you were young, your mother undoubtedly taught you that being selfish was not a good thing. But..as in most things in life..there is an upside and a downside. The downside to selfish behavior is well-known and understood. The upside, much less so.
Whether it's caring for your health and making sure you are eating well and exercising, or mastering overall balance in your life... which benefits everyone around you... Put Yourself First this month. Don't view it as being selfish- view it as being smart. And, I bet your mother wanted you to be smart, correct?
Make wise decisions, smart choices this month. Seize the control over your life that you truly have, and feel proud of the gift you'll be giving yourself when you Put Yourself First!
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Live more confidently in 2010!
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
In keeping with my Believe in Yourself theme and my Positive Again in 2010! January Challenge, I’ve assembled a Believe Team…a team of localexperts who will help my Talk of Connecticut listeners and NBC Connecticut viewers tackle different aspects of their lives. We’ll take on those facets of your life that, once addressed, will bring you a greater sense of happiness and fulfillment. I have experts who can work with issues in careers, emotional issues (divorce, grief, self-esteem, etc.), financial management, fashion, beauty, fitness, organization, and others.
If you or someone you know would like to work with any of my Believe Team experts, send me an email to
mary@maryjonesshow.com. They can work with you on on-air segments, and/or one-on-one coaching.
This is the year to live more confidently!!
And, my Question of the Week: What’s the one thing you always carry in your purse?
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Positive Again in 2010! A kick-off to the New Year, and letting go of draining friendships
Wed, Dec 29, 2009
Over the holiday weekend, I was in the company of a few negative people. Truly negative folks. It reminded me how toxic, unsatisfying and exhausting that emotion is, not to mention how much of an obstacle it serves in living a fulfilled, successful life.
It inspired me to develop a slogan for 2010, and to kick it off through my January Challenge. Positive Again in 2010!! Having a positive attitude is the cornerstone for success in life. It’s the cornerstone of the theme of my show, which is Believe in Yourself.
I’ll be talking throughout the month on my radio show about specific ways to cultivate and expand a positive approach to life. We’ll check in also mid-Jan on All That & More about people’s experiences and insights.
There is no better, more important way to start your New Year than to join in my Positive Again in 2010 slogan and challenge!
Also, for some, the New Year might be a great time to assess those draining friendships you may have in your life. Remind yourself that you deserve more rewarding ones. People and relationships change over the years...sometimes there is nothing you can do to help an old friend. Sometimes, if you take a close, honest look, you realize that they’re not really true friends anyway. If you feel that you’re giving more than you’re getting, it might be time to let it go. It’s OK to do that…sometimes it’s healthy to do that. You deserve rewarding friendships.
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Tips to keep your New Year's Resolutions, and...interacting with women make men stupid!
Wednesday, Dec 23, 2009
Based on research examining secrets of motivated people, there are some things you can do to actually accomplish your New Years goals this year:
- Work on them every day. This will hold your interest and ensure you make progress each day.
- Go public with them. Tell other people. We don’t abandon our dreams as much if we’ve told other people about them.
- Remember the deeper meaning. Research shows we complete more goals if they have true personal significance to us.
Interacting with women make men stupid!
According to a recent article in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, mixed-sex interaction temporarily caused a decline in cognitive functioning of men. Men were asked to perform cognitive tasks (memory tests) before and after interactions, and their performances ranked less after interaction with a woman. These effects held independent of whether the men were romantically involved or single.
The same tests were done with women, but a decline was only observed if the women were single, and if they were attracted to the man.
Now...this is very interesting!!
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First loves, and a beauty tip!
Wednesday, Dec 9, 2009
Do you remember your first love? I’m not talking about a childhood crush, but your first serious relationship. It doesn’t matter if you actually voiced the “I love you” phrase or not, but that relationship that stole your heart.
First loves may be more significant to women, I’m not sure. Women tend to view romance and relationships from more of an emotional place than some men so they may leave their mark a bit more.
I’m going to be talking about first loves on my radio show in January and am trying to track down my first love….Charlie, from my college days. We haven’t been in touch for many, many years but I’m going to try to get him to come on the show….now, this could be interesting!!
Do you remember your first love?
And, here’s a quick beauty tip for applying eye cream. If you use eye cream…and, you probably should….keep in mind that the skin around our eyes is sensitive and delicate, so make sure you dab, not rub the cream. And, it’s best to use the tip of your ring finger. It is the softest finger tip, much more so than the index finger which many women use.
So... dab, and don't rub, and use your ring finger to apply.
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Holiday stress and thank you notes
Wednesday, Dec 2, 2009
Since last week, I’ve noticed the presence of stress in people’s voices. Well, to be more specific, I’ve noticed it in women’s voices. Not so much for men’s. Is that because women do more to prepare for the holidays than men? Probably so. Now, that isn’t based on any research, just a gut feel.
In most families that I know, the woman does more of the gift shopping, menu planning, and grocery shopping and cooking. Would you agree with that?
I recommend women not try to orchestrate the “perfect” holiday…that is the cause of much too much stress. If traditions don’t have significant meaning to you and your family any longer, or are just too time-consuming, it’s OK to amend them. Give yourself permission to do so…it’s really OK.
Speaking of the holidays, from an etiquette perspective, what do you think about the need to send thank you notes for gifts?
The etiquette experts I’ve consulted say a resounding “yes”, unless you open the gift in front of the person who gave it to you. In that case, you can thank them personally. But, otherwise yes. And, handwritten notes are the best…rather than email.
It’s also good to teach children to write thank you notes. Make it fun. Get everyone together at the kitchen table, have thank you cards, pens, crayons for the little ones, music playing. Have everyone write their cards together. When everyone is done, have a dessert or some treat.
Any other thoughts?
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Birthdays!
Wed, Nov 18, 2009
Today is my birthday. I have always thought birthdays to be very special days, and the older I get, the more special they become.
What becomes significant…along with the obvious…is how we choose to spend our birthdays. Some people prefer to keep it very low-key while others want to celebrate to the max!
When your birthday rolls around again, make a point of spending it the way you want to- not how others think you should. It really is “your” day. Think ahead of time of how you choose to spend it, and stick with that. Let your family and friends in on what your preference is so they don’t unintentionally plan something you’re not going to be happy with.
Now…that’s the hard part for me. Because I’ve always been excited about birthdays, I have always assumed that others feel the same way. The thought of keeping a birthday low-key has been somewhat foreign to me. But, I’ve learned over the years to try to respect other’s wishes when they truly don’t want to make a big deal out of their birthday. So, now…though admittedly reluctantly…when a friend tells me her preference is to ‘no nothing special’ on her birthday, I honor that. I very simply, honor that. I’ve made great progress…though still have to work hard at it. How about you?
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A new Monthly Challenge!
Wednesday, Nov 11, 2009
It's hard to believe that the holidays are almost upon us. And, if you're like so many, that reality conjures up some related stress...but hopefully, some happy memories and traditions, as well. But...back to the stress part...it inspired my Monthly Challenge for November...Learn to breathe correctly! Let's master proper breathing so we can use it as a de-stressor during these busy times. Breathing properly gets more oxygen to your cells and can even help your body heal faster from illness, lower blood pressure and possibly help immunity.
And, as with many things in life, there's a correct and incorrect way to do it. But, the correct way is simple and can become second nature with just a bit of practice.
Most people breathe too shallowly....it's a common result of a fast-paced life. To reap more benefits, take a deep breath and extend your abdomen out as you do. Most people simply fill their lungs when they inhale and their abdomens go in, instead of out. Practice inhaling and pushing out your abdomen. For inspiration, watch a baby breathe. Babies slowly draw air deep into their lungs, expanding their abdomens, then exhale slowly. Follow their lead.
It took me about 1 month before it became second nature. Now, when I inhale, my abdomen extends....does yours?? I love things in life that are simple....this is one of them!
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Shaking hands during flu season? Make a Difference Day!
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
The flu season is here. We’re told not to have unnecessary contact with other people. Well, in social and business situations, how can you avoid shaking hands, for example, without offending someone? I consulted the experts, and here are their tips:
1) Restrain yourself from friendly hugs and kisses. It might be hard if you’re a naturally affectionate hugger and kisser, but while it might be appreciated during other times, it won’t be at this time.
2) Here’s a replacement for your usual friendly handshake- when greeting people on the street or at an event, raise your right hand in a quick salute and put it back down to your side again. Accompany this gesture with a wide, friendly grin and a cheerful spoken greeting: "Hello, George. Great to see you!" Your voice and your smile will compensate for any rejected handshake. Even if George had already put his hand out, ready to grasp yours in the old familiar warm greeting, he will understand your new gesture and will not suffer from emotional rejection.
3) If someone is quick to kiss you….wait a few moments and excuse yourself to the restroom and wash your face.
4) And, experts agree that during flu season, it's impolite to shake hands. If a person offers you his or her hand, resist the temptation to grab it. Tell them politely that as it is flu season, you want to protect them from anything you may have touched. Never suggest to another person that it is they whose contagion you fear, even if it is true.
And, Oct 24 is Make a Difference Day, the national day of helping others. It can be small or big. Give some thought to what you can do on that day. For example, help a neighbor, collect needed items for a school, shelter or food bank, clean-up your street or neighborhood, and make a donation. Get creative! It feels great!
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An evening of beauty and fashion! Girl’s Night Out!
Wednesday, Oct 14, 2009
Join me at my next Girl’s Night Out event! Wed, Oct 28 at 6 pm at Adams Mill Restaurant in Manchester.
Miss CT Sharalynn Kuziak, former Miss Southington, will speak about how she is preparing for the Miss America pageant in Las Vegas in Janurary. In addition to being a lovely young woman, she has an inspiring story to share.
And, three women will be showcased modeling this season’s trends. We’ll learn how to dress stylishly and look 10 lbs thinner!
There will be some surprises, and a free candle for everyone!
Dinner is only $25.00, including tax/tip. For reservations, please call Adams Mill Restaurant at (860) 646-4039.
Hope to see you there!!
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October Challenge! And, proven household hints!
Wednesday, Oct 7, 2009
A new month…of course, a new Challenge!
This month- Reach out to estranged family and friends! Renew those relationships that have fallen by the wayside. Chances are, the reasons don’t matter much anymore. Even if they seemed to be good at the time….do they still? Is your pride, ego or stubbornness preventing you from reaching out? Don’t let it. Get back in touch with those folks who were once close to you…maybe before the holidays? Consider it, at least…do it for you!
And….useful household hints! Do you have any to share? Some tried-and-true tips? For example:
- To remove wax from a candle holder, put it in the freezer for 15 min or so, and the wax will pop out!
- To remove static from skirts or pants when wearing pantyhose- put a safety pin on the seam, and…no more static!
- Chalkboard erasers work wonders on foggy windshields…carry one if your car.
- To open a sealed envelope…place it in the freezer for 1 hour and it will unseal easily.
- Before pouring sticky substances (peanut butter, molasses,) in a measuring cup, fill it with hot water, pour out water but don’t dry cup. Pour in sticky substance and it will slide right out! Spraying the cup with Pam first also works!
What tips do you have?
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Bored? Unhappy? Do something about it!!
Wednesday, Sept 23, 2009
21% of Americans say they are "bored out of their minds" on a regular basis. What can be done about that? A lot!! As I remind people all the time…we have a lot more control over our days and lives than we realize, and more than most people take advantage of. The downside to not addressing boredom, or unhappiness, is that it will continue, and last longer than it needs to and will rob you of enjoyment in your life. It can actually contribute to more serious emotional and physical problems…depression, overeating, etc.
So, realize you can do something about it! Be prepared with things to do when you feel bored or unhappy. Have an arsenal of things ready when you need them. Don’t wait until you’re feeling those emotions to come up with them.
For example, play your favorite music, call friends, play with your pet, read your favorite book passage or quote.
What ideas do you have to share?
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A September Challenge, Question of the Week, and…let’s do something nice for someone!!
Wednesday, Sept 2, 2009
The beginning of a new month, so of course…. a new Monthly Challenge for you! For September, let’s get our homes and offices ship-shape! Before the busy-ness of the holidays sets in, let's make some (probably overdue!!) progress with this so we can feel good going into the end of the year. I know, I know, this isn’t necessarily a fun thing… and that has already been pointed out to me by several listeners! But, it probably needs to be done, and just think about how great you’ll feel once it is!!
And, my Question of the Week: What do you like most about the fall? What's your favorite aspect of the season? Since I get so bummed thinking about summer being over, I need to focus on positives about the upcoming season! What are yours?
And, let’s do something nice for someone! The best way to get your mind away from yourself is to do something for someone else. It’s a remarkable thing…will makes you feel terrific!
Some examples…. drop in to meet a new neighbor, SMILE at someone…might be the bright spot of their day, take food/blankets to an animal shelter, donate your unused clothes, reach out to someone who is having a difficult time….SO many ways to do a nice thing for someone!
Unrelated…something to ponder…ever notice that people seem to prefer sitting as far away from each other as possible in restaurants, movie theaters, etc? Notice next time you’re in a seat-yourself restaurant….customers tend to sit in sections where no one else is sitting. Why do you think that is?
Let’s try to care less what others think, and… what does your cell phone ring say about you?
Wednesday, Sept 16, 2009
It may be more true for women than men…not sure about that…but it sure seems that an awful lot of people lose opportunities and create more stress for themselves because they care too much what other people think.
Other than your spouse, parents, and certainly your boss, maybe we might want to take a look at how much emphasis we put on others’ opinions of us. Why does it matter? Wouldn’t life seem a bit easier if we simply focused on what we think of us, and not what others think? Your thoughts?
And….I was sitting in a coffee shop recently and noticed the many different types of rings on cell phones. Some very musical, some very ordinary, some very dramatic and unique. What does your cell phone ring say about you? (Mine? Louie Armstrong’s “What a wonderful world”. )
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Would love to see you on Wed, Feb 24, 6 pm for my next Girl's Night Out event! It's going to be great!!
Carolyn Phillips from Fit Behavior will kick off the evening and lead us in an energizing, fun, get-your-blood-flowing routine before dinner.
Our guest speaker, TV Host, author and lifestyle expert and Westport resident Mar Jennings will be "Creating Casual Luxury!" Mar informs and inspires with simple yet clever tips and complete projects that are easy and fun. Mar's distinctive casual luxury style has garnered him praise and recognition as a definitive source on home, gardening and lifestyle. He will awaken all of your senses. Plus, his projects are functional, beautiful and attainable!
We'll be at the Stonewell Restaurant in Farmington. $25 includes your choice of; Tilapia, Chicken Picata, Prime Rib or Cheese Ravioli, plus salad, coffee, tea and dessert. Hope to see you there!
Call 860-677-8855 to make your reservations now!
Let's not be intimidated by anyone or anything.
Sounds tough? It doesn't need to be. If you make a habit of approaching situations and people from a positive perspective, and expect positive outcomes, you'll usually get them.
One truly simple trick is to act confident, even if you are not feeling it. Research shows that your body will begin to feel the way it is acting, so if you act self-assured, you will soon begin to feel it. It's true- it takes just a few moments for your brain to catch up with your behavior.
Think of someone you know who seems self-assured in social situations. Observe how she acts and what she does. What does she do when she enters a room? When she approaches someone? Watch, observe and learn.
You can even make a game out of it. Make it fun. Consider it mental role-playing, as if you are an actor in a play. Imagine yourself playing the role of a super-confident, assured, popular character who thrives in social situations. Become that person mentally. Behave the way you envision she would.
If you can fake it for a short period of time, you'll soon be feeling it. Act confident and you'll soon feel confident. Try it for your next job interview, business presentation, networking event or date.
Don't let your lack of confidence get the best of you. Don't let it cause you to miss out on the many wonderful opportunities that surround you, meeting people and entering situations that could somehow benefit you.
Let's not be intimidated by anyone or anything! Isn't that a wonderful way to go through life. No intimidations! Just think of the possibilities! It is your choice. You have the power to make it become your reality!
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What’s your favorite time of day? And…you can ACT happy or confident, even if you’re not feeling it…
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Recently on my radio show, I asked, “What is your favorite time of day?” Mine? Early morning….I’ve grown to like the stillness, quiet and anticipation for what the day might hold in store. Many prefer bedtime, when they can reflect back on their day, and some prefer dinnertime when their families get together.
Hey, I just had a different answer- how ‘bout “right now”? Wouldn’t that be a great response to that question??
And, unrelated….If you want to be happy, or confident, but aren't feeling that way, ACT it!Our feelings follow actions, so you can fake it until you feel it! It works! (good for job interviews, public speaking…ACT and you will begin to FEEL that way!)
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Let’s laugh more!!
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
How about this…let’s do a better job of laughing more! Studies show that an average small child laughs more than 400 times a day, but an average adult laughs 17 times. And, I bet some adults don’t even reach that number most days!
Laughter is good for you…it lowers blood pressure, boosts immunity system, and even increases tolerance for pain.
Do you remember the last time you had a good belly laugh? The kind of laugh that actually begins to hurt your stomach because you’re laughing so hard, yet can’t seem to stop? Is anything better?
So, let’s all try to laugh out loud, more often!!
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Guys & Girl’s Night Out! And, Yvonne!!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
While I’ve hosted Girl’s Night Out events for several years, I guess it wouldn’t kill me to include the guys once a year! So, on Wed, Aug 26 at 6 pm at the Stonewell Restaurant in Farmington, join me for a Guys & Girl’s Night Out! Yvonne Nava will be a guest speaker along with nationally-renowned and CT resident, Psychic Richard Jackson.
It will be a great evening, and I hope to see you there! Only $25.00 for a yummy dinner…call for reservations, (860) 677-8855.
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Things to do in a lifetime!!
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
I chatted today on All That & More about giving thought to a list of things that you’d like to do in your lifetime, not necessarily things that you’ll regret if you don’t (as in a “bucket list”), but activities that you think would simply add something to your life.
For example, my list included coming up with a signature dish, a meal that I can make quickly, without referring to a recipe, and that I can make with confidence as I know it will come out well... (for me- pork tenderloin, mashed cauliflower and roasted asparagus).
It adds simplicity to my life for as long as I have the ingredients on-hand, I know I can pull off a good-tasting meal that also looks pretty on a platter!
Also on my list is going on a silent retreat for 3 days. I think it would offer a great deal of insight, (as people tell me who have done it), not to mention the overall experience. Whether I will ever actually do it or not, who knows, but it’s on my list.
As is decorating one room to be my personal space…a place I can retreat to and instantly gain a sense of calm and relaxation. I did that two years ago and am so glad I had put it on my list…now, I can check it off!
Think about what you might put on your “things I want to do this lifetime” list….what comes to mind??
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Let’s be more spontaneous! And…remember to eat breakfast!!
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
My Monthly Challenge for July is to Be More Spontaneous! The summer is a more casual, low-key time of year… let’s include more impromptu, spur-of-the-moment invites in our days! Though life seems to be so hectic that advance planning is the only way to get done everything we need to do, for this month, let’s try being spontaneous!! It will be fun!!
And, a reminder to eat breakfast… Successful dieters share a common habit-they eat breakfast. Eating your morning meal makes it easier to lose, and keep off, weight. Plus, it boosts your mood, energy, and memory.
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Napping ... and household tips!!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
A recent study found that a 10-min nap leaves you feeling the most refreshed, rested and alert. Longer is not better when it comes to napping. Naps longer than that tend to leave you drowsier when you wake up. So…10-minutes it is! And, if you’re feeling worn down and not able to take a nap (some corporations now offer nap rooms!!); researchers suggest taking a 5-min walk …not as good as a nap, but close!!
Here are two unrelated household tips:
1. To stop tears while peeling onions, open the freezer door and place your face in the cold air for a moment. The cold air instantly constricts the tear ducts and your tears subside!
2. When barbecuing burgers, use different colored toothpicks to indicate the rare, medium, well-done burgers when serving...no confusion!
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Girl’s Night Out!
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Would love to see you on Wed, June 24 at Crowne Plaza, Cromwell for my next Girl’s Night Out! Humorist, author, columnist Gina Barreca will share her thoughts on “Humor and Unlocking the Key to Laughter in Women’s Lives”! Also, WDRC’s Brad Davis will speak on Inspiration, Passion and Hope. Only $25.00 for dinner, including dessert, coffee/tea, tax and tip. Call (860) 807-2450 for reservation. Would love to see you there!
On an unrelated note, I’m starting a 2-week detox/cleanse…no red meat, refined sugar, alcohol or caffeine. A great way to cleanse the body and kick start overall organ health, even weight loss! Have you ever tried it?
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Proms and a New Monthly Challenge!
Wed, June 3, 2009
It’s prom time of year! Do you remember your junior or senior prom? Hopefully, with happy memories?!! Young women today certainly are more sophisticated than when I was in high school. Today...elegant, strapless gowns rather than the more bridesmaid-esque gowns that I remember.
For my junior prom, I had my first appt with a hair salon…very exciting. Except for the fact that the stylist did my hair in such a way that my date remarked when he arrived at my house, “Oh, Mary, you look just like Davy Crockett!” Not the look I was going for, but he was right…my hair was pulled over-one-side very much resembling a coon-skin cap!
Now…our June Challenge…Complain Less! It’s a way of life for many. Some folks aren’t even aware of how often they complain. This month, let’spay attention, be mindful of it, and reduce (maybe even eliminate??!!) complaints!
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Sleep Problems and Gift-Buying
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Do you have trouble sleeping? More and more people find a good night’s sleep somewhat hard to come by. Regardless of the reasons… stress, menopause… many are searching for some help.
For some, hot milk before bed, a warm bath, or reading do the trick, but if you’re still looking for the remedy to help you, give this a try.
You can train your mind to do a reversal in trying to sleep…in other words, if you try to stay awake as long as you can once you’re in bed, you may find yourself getting drowsy and falling asleep. Give it a try… try to keep your eyes open and you’ll find them wanting to close, and you may soon be asleep. I’ve tried it and it has worked!
On an unrelated note: Do you agree that men are harder to buy presents for than women? Women are simple to shop for -- items of clothing, jewelry, perfume, lotions… there’s no shortage of welcomed ideas.
Men, not so much. Though many like electronic gadgets, once a man owns an iPhone, he doesn’t need another. Or, particular software for his computer -- once he has it, he doesn’t need it again.
You can buy women all the clothes and jewelry you want…she rarely reaches a point of not needing/wanting another... so much easier!!
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Keeping Secrets, and Being in Good Moods!! Let’s do both!
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
OK, so here’s something to think about….I dare you to be in a good mood, for no reason! That’s right…for no reason! You probably have an easy time being in a good mood when something exciting happens, but…why wait? Let’s be in good moods more often, and not as a result of a specific thing or event. You know, the happier you are, the more happiness you’ll bring into your life…really! So, bring on those good moods! Give it a try, and let me know how it goes!
Also, how about if we try to keep secrets that we say we’ll keep? Resist the temptation to break someone’s confidence…don’t pass on something that was told to you as a secret. It’s easy, I know, to pass on a bit of juicy news to someone you know will want to hear it, but let’s honor our word to keep it confidential. Sounds like another challenge…you up for it??
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Join me on Sunday, June 7 when I emcee “When Mama’s Happy, Everyone’s Happy”, a special afternoon event for Mom’s of all ages.
Learn how to “Always keep the Me while always being Mommy”, parenting skills, reliable web sites for health information, and much more. You’ll also enjoy a fashion show with the latest in work, dressy and casual attire for busy mom’s and kids. The event is free, but you need to register. Light refreshments will be served. Call (860) 545-1888 to register. This event is sponsored by Hartford Hospital and will be held at Hartford Hospital Heublein Hall, 560 Hudson St, Hartford. Hope to see you there! ____________________________________________________________________________________________________
Isometrics on the go! And, what about yourself?
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
So, here’s what I started doing about two years ago…isometric exercises. That’s where you tighten muscles in a certain part of your body and hold/squeeze them tight for a certain amount of time…even 5 seconds is good. You can do them anywhere…in the car, office, on the couch, while making dinner, talking on the phone. Do them many times a day. They really are effective at toning, tightening muscles.
Recently, as I was pumping gas, I realized those 3 or 4 minutes to fill the tank could be spent on isometrics. What else are you doing while standing there waiting? Probably nothing, so give this a try. Select your arms, abdomen, or thigh muscles to tighten and hold. Tighten them as hard as you can. When you release, you’ll feel a tingly sensation, and those muscles will feel a bit more awakened…it’s a good feeling. Do it again …until your tank is filled. It’s an example of smart multi-tasking! Also….I asked a question on my radio show recently, “What do you like about yourself?” It seems to me that many people, especially women, have an easy time being self-critical, but a hard time talking about what they like about themselves. Isn’t that a shame? Many are brought up to think they’re being cocky if they say something positive about themselves…not the case! I think this is true for both personality traits and physical attributes. We should all feel comfortable using positive adjectives when talking about ourselves as well as be able to identify what we like most about ourselves physically.
It’s not being ego-centric (unless you talk about it all the time!), it’s being confident and self-assured.
So…what do you like most about yourself??
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Make A New friend! And Other Things….
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
My May Challenge ….Make one new friend! When was the last time you made a new one? Many people feel they don’t need any more friends, or are just too busy to make one. Nonsense!! True, genuine friends add so much to our lives. Make a new one this month!
And, why is it that people get so irritated when they have to wait in traffic? Instantly, many people become annoyed…even the calmest of folks! Why is it for you? I think it’s a lack of control over the situation for some…can’t do anything about it. A couple of people have mentioned claustrophia as the reason, and for some, it’s a matter of anticipating rubberneckers contributing to the back-up. What do you think?
Here’s something to consider…when you’re pumping gas, and standing there for those few minutes waiting for the car to fill up, why not do some isometrics! A good use of that time, and…they really work for tightening and toning your muscles! Try it!
Send along your comments!
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Sharing too much?
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
How much personal info do you share on Facebook, Twitter, etc? Ever post anything that you wish you hadn’t? It’s good to keep in mind that whatever you post might be viewed by your boss, your mother-in-law, your neighbor, etc. Be mindful about broadcasting too many intimate details of your life.
And, do you know your license plate number? I don’t, and wasn’t allowed to register at an office building security desk without going back to the parking lot to check my number! Now, if your plate is a vanity plate, it doesn’t count as that’s too easy to remember. But, I wonder how many people know theirs? And…more men than women?
One more question for you to comment on….how many states have you lived in? I can only claim CT, having grown up in New Britain, attended undergraduate and graduate school here, and have worked here since. I’ll admit that I do wish I had taken the opportunity of living elsewhere, just for the experience. If I had it to do over again, I would have gone to college out-of-state. So…how many states have you lived in?
Send me your comments below! Look forward to hearing from you!
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Lots of things…..
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Lots to chat about this week!
If you’re like many people, it’s fun to think about nostalgic memories, so here’s a question…What is one of your most favorite recipes from your childhood? I bet you can see it in your mind and almost taste it!
Mine is my mother’s spaghetti sauce…just delicious! Growing up in NB, many of my best friends were Italian and having dinner at their house was a treat. While my mother had no Italian blood, she made the best sauce! And, even though she showed me several times how to make it, it never even came close to hers.
I’ve been struggling with whether or not to buy a Blackberry so I’d be able to receive emails when I’m away from home. So far, I’ve resisted, but I can tell I’m weakening. Is staying in constant contact a positive, or negative??
My Question of the Week on my radio show is “What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?” I remember my father telling my older sister when she was working on an advanced degree that persistence counts for more in life than even intelligence, that those who stick-with-it will go far. So true!
Is there one word you have trouble pronouncing? I’ve discovered recently that I do…the word exasperate. I have to slow down, make a point of enunciating each syllable slowly and precisely, otherwise, it comes out wrong. How about you?
Send your comments below!
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Mothers-in-Law!! .... And Smiles..!
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Having just spent 5 days with my mother-in-law over the Easter holiday, there is a lot to talk about on this subject! How is/was your relationship with your mother-in-law? Send along any significant or memorable stories!
I've learned that we have a lot to do with how positive or negative the relationship is. And, certainly, some are more or less challenging than others!!
Also...a reminder of my Monthly Challenge for April: "Get your body moving!" How are you doing with that? Remember, exercise doesn't need to be structured or organized...figure out a way that will work for you to make it fun! Add music to a work-out, choose an activity to do with a friend, think creatively! Send along your ideas for others!
And....the Power of a Smile! They are contagious, you know. They can significantly impact how people will approach and interact with you. Use them to your benefit!
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Wednesday, April 8, 2009
A viewer had emailed and asked if we’d talk about something related to men, in addition to women. Well…here’s something for him!
At one point last year, I asked two questions on my show and couldn’t believe the difference between the answers coming from men, and women. “Do you remember your first car?” Every man who responded shared memories of his first car in great detail, from the size of the engine and tires, to the time it took to reach 80 mph! Great detail!! Women’s memories, however, were quite vague. The color of the car seemed to be the most significant memory, and details beyond that were fuzzy.
But…to the questions, “Do you remember your first date?”, the responses were totally reversed. Women answered with enormous specificity, remembering what they wore, where they ate, what they ordered, what their date wore, and what time they got home. Men? Not so much! Most had a general recollection of what restaurant they went to, but anything beyond that was uncertain.
So….seems to me that if a memory involves machines, equipment or toys, men win hands down in the recall area, but if it’s about relationships, emotions or romance, women got ‘em beat!!
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Join me at Girl's Night Out!
Re: Men
I host Girl's Night Out events the last Wed of every other month, and my next one is April 29! Join me at Baci Grill in Cromwell (minutes off I-91!!) and meet Dr Bernie Siegel, who will share his insights on "The Art of Living and Healing". Bernie Siegel broke new ground with his monumental book Love, Medicine, and Miracles, in which he explored the powerful role the mind can play in fighting illness. His latest book, In Faith, Hope, and Healing, Siegel shares the inspiring stories of people who have experienced cancer and found deeper faith, hope, joy, and healing through the process.
The cost for dinner is $25.00, tax/tip included. Call Baci Grill at (860) 613-2224 for reservations.
Look forward to seeing you April 29th at 6 pm!
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Looking Back....and Breaking Up with your Hairdresser!
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Is there one person in your life, other than a parent, who has had a profound impact on you? A teacher, coach, neighbor? If there is, have you told that person?
If that individual is still around, consider sharing your memories with him/her…can you imagine a more wonderful message to convey?
And, on a totally different note, here’s an awkward scenario that many women can relate to - wanting to break up with your hairdresser!! Have you ever done it, and if so, how?
Our relationships with our hairdressers can be somewhat intimate, in terms of the conversations we share, and the amount of time spent in their chair….a color and cut alone can take a couple of hours!
So, when you feel you need to make a change, but don’t want to offend, how do you do it?
Keep in mind that you might run into them in the grocery store or Post Office. So, telling them you’re moving across country might not be the thing to do!
I think honesty is the best way to approach it, even though it might be somewhat difficult. Most hairdressers have experienced this before, so it won’t be as potentially awkward for them, as it is for you. Be upfront and direct. Say something simple, such as “I’m just not getting the look that I want; I think it’s time for me to try someone new.”
Chances are…assuming your hairdresser is a reasonable person…things will be fine, and there won’t be hard feelings.
Send your comments below, share your experiences, and any tips!
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Make a Difference in Someone's Day!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Here’s something that’s simple, yet few people do often enough…in my opinion. And, it can make a big difference in someone’s day. Giving people compliments! Think about it…don’t you feel just wonderful when someone says something nice about you? You find yourself smiling… at least on the inside….for hours! I think we should all give more compliments. You can truly make someone’s day, with little effort! And, you’ll find that you also feel good when you compliment someone…you’ll release a little tension in your body...it’s a real win/win!
I challenge you to give 5 compliments every day! Make sure they are sincere. It can be as simple as “I really like your cologne”, or “You have a great laugh!”, “You always look so pulled together”, “You did a great job clearing the table”, etc. Everyday things…compliment those around you who are doing them!
On a different subject, I talked on my radio show about how people tend to handle bad service in restaurants....wow, lots of opinions!! And, who hasn’t experienced that? Some folks leave no tip, some leave one penny, to really get the point across. Others…. leave 5%, 10%, or yell at the wait person….what’s best, most effective? I asked many restaurant owners, and they all agree (well, mostly!) that the best thing in that situation is to get up from the table and talk to the manager. Explain (hopefully, calmly) your dissatisfaction with the service.
Send me an email and share your experiences and thoughts in the comments section below!
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
I've discovered over the years that few topics pull at our heartstrings as much as our pets... cats, dogs, birds... we are passionate about our pets!!
My Question of the Week for you is: "What is a cute or funny thing that your pet does?"
My dog, Archie, a 10-year-old West Highland White Terrier, whenever he finishes eating, he runs and crams 2 or 3 of his favorite toys in his mouth and brings them to me, with his tail wagging. It always seems that he gets so happy having a full belly that he can't help himself from sharing the joy and, his toys.
I tell you, if I'm ever in a bad mood, the sight of him with his little mouth jam-packed with toys instantly gives me a lift!
And, I'm sure you've heard how beneficial health-wise it is to spend time with animals. The medical community now knows that it can lower blood pressure, reduce stress and even add to your longevity. So.... get on the floor and play with your cat or dog! It will make them happy, and you.... happy and healthier!
Send me an e-mail and share your pet story!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
My March Challenge for you: Put WOW in your behavior!
Do things that will leave people saying “Wow”! At work, with your friends and family….leave them with a “Wow”! Think about things you can do to impress others, go above-and-beyond and leave your mark! And think about ways you can impress yourself! That is just as important.
An example hit me while working out last week on my iPod. (It was a Christmas gift from my husband -- he downloaded my favorite CD's -- perfect for working out at home. Nothing better than peppy music to get you moving and keep you motivated!) I had an idea that kept my mind focused, and off watching the time. So, when I stopped jumping/kicking/dancing around the house (it's just about keeping moving, I tell myself... it doesn't have to be pretty!!), I noticed I had exercised for 12 minutes longer than I normally do. Now that's a WOW!!
What can you do to surpass expectations at work, or with your family, or ...with yourself? Share your ideas and experiences in the comments section.
Unrelated... While at a doctor's office last week, filling out the required questionnaire which asked to list my hobbies, I wrote -- without even thinking, or realizing what I was writing -- "relaxing"!
Relaxing? I don't quite think that qualifies as a hobby! That's kind of a pathetic response, but... obviously a true one for me!! Are you a hobby person?
Also... A listener phoned into my show last Saturday asking for input on how long after a divorce one should wait before starting to date? He is in that situation and is struggling with the decision. What's your opinion on that? A year? Immediately?
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Do you get into fixing people up? If so, have you ever been successful?
I just love fixing people up, I do it all the time. I've done it for years…but have never been successful. Not once. My husband can't understand why I continue to try.
The difficulty in making matches, I think, is while it's relatively easy to predict compatibility based on common interests, it's almost impossible to predict chemistry. And, that's the stumbling block: chemistry. Either it's there between two people or it isn't. Let me know if you have a secret to fixing people up that I haven't figured out yet.
And, my Question of the Week: What is your favorite month, and why? Mine? May. It's the unofficial beginning to my favorite season - summer. Enter your answer in the comment section below!
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
I chatted with Brad Drazen on the 11:00 am news show about my Happiness Meter, something I developed a couple of years ago on my radio show. It seemed to me at that time that many folks were dealing with stress, unhappiness and anxiety. And those emotions are a way of life...or, so it seems at times, doesn't it?
I came up with a tool to help diffuse those feelings before they escalate.
The thing about stress is that if it goes unaddressed, it builds. And where you might feel stressful at a moment in time, hours, days and weeks can pass and the momentary stress has become a part of your daily life. That's not good. That's where it can affect your physical and emotional health.
So, here's something to help.
At any point during your day, or at many points during your day, ask yourself, "How happy am I feeling right now?" Don't worry about how happy you were yesterday, or how you hope to feel tomorrow, but right now. On a scale of 1-5, with 5 being the highest, assign a number to your level of happiness at the moment.
1: Despondent
2: Stressed/frazzled
3: Content
4: Pretty darn happy!
5: Ecstatic
And, if you relate better to visual images than words, picture:
1: A black cloud
2: Your hair standing
3: A comfy chair
4: Smiley face
5: You doing a cartwheel on end
If you peg yourself at a 2, for example, have an arsenal of things that you can instantly do, anywhere, that will raise your number to a 3. You can positively raise your Happiness Meter number, at any time (we seem to forget that we have control over a lot of this, don't we?).
Think of what in your life makes you happy - develop a list. Some suggestions from my listeners: Think of your dog/cat/child/spouse, take 5 deep-breaths, call a friend, play a favorite song, do 5-seconds of isometrics, read a page from your favorite book. Figure out what works for you...it's different for everyone. For me? If I'm home, I sit on the floor and play with my dog, Archie, for a couple of minutes...does wonders!
It works! Incorporate it into your day, week, month; whenever you think to do it. Send me an email and share your ideas.
On this same subject, I have a Question of the Week on my radio show, and recently asked, "What in your life always makes you smile?" Guess the #1 answer. If you guessed "my pet"...you're right! Interestingly, no one said "my spouse"....interesting!
Mary Jones hosts "The Mary Jones Show" on a number of Connecticut radio stations, and she joins NBC30 at 11 a.m. and 5 p.m. every Wednesday. Read her notes here, and on her website, http://maryjonesshow.com
Sleep Problems and Gift-Buying
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Do you have trouble sleeping? More and more people find a good night’s sleep somewhat hard to come by. Regardless of the reasons… stress, menopause…many are searching for some help.
For some, hot milk before bed, a warm bath, or reading do the trick, but if you’re still looking for the remedy to help you, give this a try.
You can train your mind to do a reversal in trying to sleep…in other words, if you try to stay awake as long as you can once you’re in bed, you may find yourself getting drowsy and falling asleep. Give it a try…try to keep your eyes open and you’ll find them wanting to close, and you may soon be asleep. I’ve tried it and it has worked!
On an unrelated note….do you agree that men are harder to buy presents for than women? Women are simple to shop for….items of clothing, jewelry, perfume, lotions…there’s no shortage of welcomed ideas. Men…not so much. Though many like electronic gadgets, once a man owns an I-phone, he doesn’t need another. Or, particular software for his computer- once he has it, he doesn’t need another.
You can buy women all the clothes and jewelry you want…she rarely reaches a point of not needing/wanting another….so much easier!!
Sleep Problems and Gift-Buying
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Do you have trouble sleeping? More and more people find a good night’s sleep somewhat hard to come by. Regardless of the reasons… stress, menopause…many are searching for some help.
For some, hot milk before bed, a warm bath, or reading do the trick, but if you’re still looking for the remedy to help you, give this a try.
You can train your mind to do a reversal in trying to sleep…in other words, if you try to stay awake as long as you can once you’re in bed, you may find yourself getting drowsy and falling asleep. Give it a try…try to keep your eyes open and you’ll find them wanting to close, and you may soon be asleep. I’ve tried it and it has worked!
On an unrelated note….do you agree that men are harder to buy presents for than women? Women are simple to shop for….items of clothing, jewelry, perfume, lotions…there’s no shortage of welcomed ideas. Men…not so much. Though many like electronic gadgets, once a man owns an I-phone, he doesn’t need another. Or, particular software for his computer- once he has it, he doesn’t need another.
You can buy women all the clothes and jewelry you want…she rarely reaches a point of not needing/wanting another….so much easier!!
