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Being the boss can be very stressful—but is it OK to vent at work? Only if you do this 1 thing, workplace therapist says

Being the boss can be very stressful—but is it OK to vent at work? Only if you do this 1 thing, workplace therapist says
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  • Being the boss can be very stressful—but is it OK to vent at work? Only if you do this 1 thing, workplace therapist says

With every promotion comes a weightier title, higher salary, and fresh set of stressors.

However, the more people you manage and the further up the professional ladder you climb, the more important it is to keep your cool, says Brandon Smith, a therapist and career coach known as The Workplace Therapist.

Slightly raising your voice during a team meeting is interpreted differently depending on what rank you hold in your office.

"With every promotion your emotional reaction gets more exaggerated in the eyes of your team," Smith says. "Your level matters."

This doesn't mean you can never express disappointment or aggravation. You just have to do so tactfully.

'No one is naming their emotion'

If you feel yourself getting overwhelmed, withdraw from the situation, Smith says.

"You want to step back and either find someone you can talk to about it or you need to find some other way for relief," he says.

The next step is crucial, and one many managers fail to do: communicate with your team why you needed to take space.

"We are going to get upset," Smith says. "That's human. The missing ingredient is no one is naming their emotion."

In the absence of an explanation, people assume the worst.

"If you go off and you go radio silent for two days, that doesn't give your team confidence or security," he says.

To avoid any confusion you might want to tell your team why you're leaving before you take a step back, says Amy Edmondson, a professor of leadership and management at Harvard University and author of "The Fearless Organization: Creating Psychological Safety in the Workplace for Learning, Innovation, and Growth."

"You're a human being," she says. "Say 'I'm finding myself so frustrated right now and I'm at risk of saying something I regret. If you'll let me be human for a little bit, I'm going to try to cope with this and I'll be back later in a better headspace.'"

By expressing how you're feeling and that you need to take a few minutes for yourself, you're creating an environment of transparency and trust.

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